Struggling to fall asleep. Ever had one of those nights? The weight of being a mom and wanting to help my daughter has hit me hard.
My daughter is one of the sweetest little girls, I am a bit partial. Since the age of 5 she has struggled with failure, I have mentioned this in previous posts. However tonight, we had an incident that about broke this momma into pieces.
My daughters are currently involved in a puppetry group for our church. It is part of a Fine Arts type of competition. Well, my oldest has the most lines out of the group. And unfortunately she is also finding out that she is not fond of the coaches nor the actual puppetry aspect. The coach made a statement, “We need to do amazing, and win, so that other kids will want to be a part of this next year.”
Now, for a normal child, this probably wouldn’t be a big deal. Yet, my oldest struggles immensely with perfectionism. So, when she told me all of this, I knew where her mind was going.
“What if I mess up?” “We won’t win because of me.” “I got to memorize my lines perfectly.” “This is all riding on me, any mess up is my doing.”
I have worked with her so much. She is also in the throws of puberty, thank you hormones. So all this was a huge gut punch to me. Something that should be fun, has started to turn into anxiety.
As I sit here, trying to get tired enough to fall asleep, I know that my God has this. Logically I know He loves my daughter more than I do. It is in this moment that I repeat the verse;
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble of heart; and you will find rest. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
I am a Mom, but I am God’s Daughter first. He has this whole situation in His hands and I can rest.