Approval Disease

I feel a possible book coming out of this, but that will definitely be a God thing. English, grammar, punctuation, has never been my strong suit.

Hey my name is Gina and I am a recovering people pleaser. Maybe you know of someone that struggles with this disease. You probably wouldn’t classify it as a disease, unless you have struggled with it. It can wreck your life if you cannot rewire your brain.

What do I mean by that? My world for the last few years of my life has been wrapped up in meeting others’ needs to gain their approval. Saying Yes to almost everything. Projects, little errands, answering endless phone calls, all in the name of this approval disease.

Facebook and Instagram created this HUGE snowball effect in my life. Watching other’s posts get more likes, more comments, and straight up more traction. Meanwhile, I was lucky to get 1 or 2. It would hit me like a ton of bricks, like a smack in the face. I couldn’t understand what they were doing that was so different. I began analyzing, at times copying their methods, appealing to the masses. It was such a sickness.

Then, almost a month ago, I got this deep, deep feeling that I needed to take a break from social media. I had done these breaks before, they would last like 2 days. But, God was asking for 21 days!!! 21 days without approval. Now ya have to know something, I use social media for my business. This was asking a lot. However, I cannot argue with the Almighty God.

I am on day 11. Something that also makes this a very unique experience is, we are currently down to one vehicle. One vehicle that fits 3 people, we are a family of 5. I have not been able to leave my home in 25 days. I have not received what you would call outside approval as well. These 11 days have literally been me and God.

This disease is something that is getting healed very deeply in me. It is rooted in not knowing my true identity. When I say “not knowing,” I know logically my identity is in Jesus Christ. However, living that logic out, wasn’t happening.

I am looking forward to sharing more with you all. This is a recovery process that has been so needed and it has already impacted my life immensely.

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